You’re the person your friends turn to for advice. You’re steady in a crisis. You can handle a packed calendar and a last-minute bachelorette night hiccup without breaking a sweat. But this? Writing a maid of honour speech for your best friend?
This is something else.
You’re emotionally intelligent, so you care about getting this right. You’re not looking to wing it or copy-paste something off the internet. You want it to sound like you: thoughtful, warm, maybe a few laughs thrown in for good measure.
This guide is here to help you shape a speech that’s heartfelt, authentic, and true to your voice — without sounding mushy, over-rehearsed, or like you Googled “best maid of honour speech jokes” at 1am.
What we’ll cover in this guide to a maid of honour speech for your best friend:
Looking for an even deeper maid of honour speech guide? Check out my Ultimate Guide to Writing a Maid of Honour Speech — it covers everything from structure to delivery style.
Step 1: Find your ‘Mic-Drop Message’ — the golden thread about your best friend that’ll create a cohesive speech
Want to know what sets an unforgettable speech apart from the ones people forget by dessert?
It’s not charisma. It’s not perfectly timed jokes. It’s a throughline.
I call it your Mic-Drop Message: the one truth about your best friend that runs through every part of your speech — the golden thread that connects every story you tell, every compliment you give, and reflection you share.
It’s what you say with your speech.
Most people skip this step.
They cobble together a few funny memories, throw in some heartfelt lines, and hope it lands. But without a central message, the speech often feels like a loose collection of moments instead of a cohesive tribute.
Your Mic-Drop Message is your anchor. It might be:
A trait that’s always been there:
“She’s always shown up for the people she loves — fiercely, without hesitation.”
A shift you’ve seen in her over time:
“Watching her grow into herself has been one of the greatest honours of my life.”
A core truth about who she is — and why she’ll be a great partner:
“She leads with love — even when things are messy.”
Ask yourself:
- What do I know about her that other people might not see right away?
- What will make her a truly great spouse?
- What’s the one thing you want her new partner — and the whole room — to understand about her?
Write that down. Say it out loud. Let it guide everything else you include.
This is the soul of your speech — and it’s what will make it stick.
Need more help developing the throughline in your maid of honour speech for your best friend? This section in my Ultimate Guide to Writing a Maid of Honour speech breaks down how.
Step 2: Use stories to bring your maid of honour speech for your best friend to life
Let’s be real — nobody remembers a list of adjectives.
“She’s kind. She’s funny. She’s beautiful.” Lovely sentiments… but they’re not going to land with the crowd.
We’re hardwired to respond to storytelling. It takes us out of the room, and places us right alongside you amongst the action.
So don’t just describe your best friend. Show the audience who she is, through the memories you share.
The best stories for a wedding speech are:
- About a specific event (like the time she took time off work to drive you to your first job interview after college, rather than a vague summary of your entire time at school)
- Emotionally revealing (they demonstrate a deep trait of hers that connects to why she’ll be a great spouse, like ‘she’s fiercely loyal’)
- Aligned with your Mic-Drop Message, so they add to the overall sentiment of your speech
You don’t need a highlight reel of your entire friendship. Just one or two moments that really show who she is — especially in the context of what will make her a great spouse.
Here are some jumping-off points:
A moment that perfectly sums her weird sense of humour up:
“She once sent me a care package with a single banana and a handwritten card that said ‘This banana reminds me of you.’”
A time you saw her kindness in action:
“On my first shift as a waitress, she and Brad booked a table so I'd have one less group of strangers to face. Then they left a 50% tip.”
Ask yourself:
- What memory do you always bring up when you talk about her?
- What’s a moment that changed the way you saw her?
- What’s a trait that will make her a great spouse, and when did you see it in action?
Step 3: Welcome her partner — simply and sincerely
Yes, this is a maid of honour speech for your best friend. But it’s also about this new chapter — and the person she’s chosen to spend it with.
You don’t need to deliver a full tribute. Just offer a moment of warmth and acknowledgement.
Reflect on how her partner brings out something new (or familiar) in her:
“You bring out the calm in her — which, trust me, is no small feat.”
Share a story or detail that shows how they fit into your friendship:
“From the first time we met, you slotted into our dynamic with a quiet confidence — like you already knew you belonged.”
Comment on how she’s changed — in a good way:
“With you, she laughs differently. More freely.”
Keep it simple and real. And if you’re not close with them, don’t force a close sentiment — focus instead on the change you’ve seen in your friend, or the way she talks about her partner.
Step 4: Structure it so it flows
You’ve done the heavy lifting. Now it’s just about putting the pieces together in a way that feels natural and easy to deliver.
✅ Here’s a foolproof structure for a best friend’s maid of honour speech:
1. Start with a short intro
Say who you are and how long you’ve known the bride. You might hint at the tone to come (funny, heartfelt, warm) with a one-liner that sums up your bond.
“I met Emma in Year 9. Within a week, she’d stolen my pen, my secrets, and my heart.”
2. Share your Mic-Drop Message
Now take that core truth you uncovered — your golden thread — and weave it into the speech early. Sharing it upfront gives your toast shape. It signals to everyone, “This is what I want you to know about her.” It adds meaning and momentum to everything that follows.
Think of it as the anchor — the insight about your best friend that only you could articulate, and that quietly explains why she’s going to make an incredible partner. It’s your foundation — and it’s strong. It gives your stories a destination, and your whole speech a sense of purpose.
3. Tell your stories
Bring your message to life with one or two stories that back it up. These should feel personal, vivid, and link back to how she’ll make a great spouse.
4. Highlight her partner
Offer a sincere moment of recognition for her partner — even just a few sentences. This doesn’t have to be a big section, but it does matter.
5. Finish with heart
Loop back to your message. Land on a generous note. Toast them with something that feels personal and true.
“To Emma and Alex — may you always be on the same team, even when you disagree on where to get dinner.”
Step 5: Remember, your maid of honour speech for your best friend doesn’t have to be hilarious
Let’s get one thing straight: this isn’t a comedy gig. You’re not here to land a Netflix special — you’re here to speak from the heart and help celebrate your best friend’s new chapter.
Your role is simple:
✅ Honour your friendship
✅ Acknowledge her partner
✅ Share your good wishes for their future
If you can do that with warmth, honesty, and a touch of your own personality, you’re already most of the way to a truly memorable speech.
That said — don’t underestimate what humour can do for you. Laughter builds a bridge between you and your audience. It signals safety, releases tension, and shows that you’re someone worth listening to. In an emotional setting like a wedding, a bit of levity can be a gift — to you and everyone listening.
Luckily, best friend territory tends to come with plenty of material.Think about it: you’ve survived bad hair phases, joint travel disasters, voice notes longer than podcasts, and at least one moment of chaos that still makes you both cry-laugh. There’s gold in there.
But here’s the key — don’t go looking for punchlines.
Write your speech honestly first. Then keep an eye out for spots where a quirky detail, a dry aside, or an exaggerated truth might add some lightness.
“She once packed six pairs of shoes for a two-day road trip.”
"She labelled her feelings in a spreadsheet once. And colour-coded them.”
“She was 100% done with dating — two weeks before meeting the love of her life.”
The most effective humour isn’t forced — it’s familiar. It comes from specificity and timing, not from trying too hard to be clever.
And if the room doesn’t laugh? That’s fine. A story told with heart will always land. A joke that doesn’t? It’s leaves the room cold in a second.
So here’s your permission: You don’t need to be a natural comedian. You just need to be the friend who truly knows her.That’s where the magic is. If a line makes you smile when you read it aloud? It’s probably worth keeping. If it doesn’t feel like you? Let it go.
Step 6: Practice like you mean it
You might be completely composed in meetings, cool under pressure, or the kind of person who plans a flawless bachelorette weekend with spreadsheets and backup plans — but speaking at your best friend’s wedding? That’s a different kind of nerve-wracking.
Because it’s not just about public speaking. It’s personal. You’re standing in front of people who matter, with all eyes on you, trying to put years of friendship into words — all while keeping it together emotionally.
So how do you stay calm and centred in the moment? Here’s how to prep in a way that builds confidence and makes space for real connection:
- Practise out loud, from start to finish. Not in your head — full volume, full voice. Let your body get used to the rhythm of it.
- Record yourself once. It might feel cringey, but it’ll help you catch where you rush, mumble, or lose your thread.
- Rehearse on your feet, notes in hand. Build some muscle memory so the moment won’t throw you.
- Test it with someone safe. A close friend, a sibling, someone who knows your bond — and will give you honest encouragement.
- Before you begin, pause. Breathe. Ground yourself. Look at your best friend.
- Speak slower than feels natural. It helps people stay with you — and gives you space to stay composed.
- If emotion shows up? Let it. A teary moment or a shaky voice doesn’t undermine your message — it deepens it.
- Pick an anchor. Whether it’s a friendly face in the crowd, your notes, or your best friend’s eyes — choose something to come back to if nerves creep in.
Step 7: Get help if you need it
Even with a clear plan, good advice, and all the heartfelt intention in the world… sometimes the words still won’t come out right.
That doesn’t mean you’re not up to it. It just means this speech matters — and when something matters, it’s easy to overthink it, second-guess yourself, or get stuck trying to make it perfect.
Here’s the reminder: you don’t have to do it alone.
At The Speech Department, I offer tools to help you find your way forward — whether you’re looking for a custom-written draft, expert feedback, or a place to practise with other thoughtful best friends writing speeches that really mean something.
